Spring is finally here which is amazing and brightens everything in such a difficult time of my life. About 2 months ago I was diagnosed with Lyme disease(which I have probably had for two years), mycoplasma pneumonia and chronic fatigue syndrome aka. being bed ridden until antibiotics and antivirals kick in which takes a while. I have to practically retrain my brain from the damage of lymes which can be painstaking.
Through all of this one of the hardest things to admit was sometimes food alone cannot cure all diseases as much as you want it to and I have taken a break from clean eating. I feel burnt out on it to be honest. Sometimes I feel it’s better to take break from clean eating than to create a negative outlook and restrict myself when my body is already under trimendious stress. I could see how someone might feel that if there was a time to eat clean it would be now but, I disagree.
My workouts now are going to the grocery store and shuffling down the aisles. This was very stressful for me- before I worked out 5 days a week. Again I have learned the world isn’t going to end if I can’t work out. I’m not even disappointed when I saw I had gained 5 pounds(what’s the big deal anyways?). Life will never be perfect and it has many ups and downs. Through life even the most avid health people have to rest and enjoy it. This is why I’m laying back enjoying my ice cream and buffalo wings and not stressing.
This illness has taught me so much strength Although this mess has caused great amounts of pain and stress on me and my family, I try my hardest not to be negative but rather thankful I was able to receive treatment so fast. I am also thankful for all of the things I have found about myself as weird and corny as it sounds. I recently got my first singing bowl and mediate daily. I also found that I have a green thumb and really enjoy planting and gardening in general! Life could be worse right?
What really my heart break into millions and millions of piece is all the people suffering way more than me and are told to see a psychologist because it’s “only in their head” and for the people who have relapses but doctors won’t give then the antibiotics they desperately need. Being sick have really put things in perspective. Before this I took my health, energy and family for granted. I can also see how much others suffer with lymes and other chronic diseases.
Mostly I am so thankful for my mom who has been through every single bad day, every break down and everything in between. She is truly the strongest and kindest woman I have ever met. She has encouraged and understood everything I have gone through. It’s so hard to see her stressed and run down from this illness. My only wish is that my mom didn’t have to suffer from the illness as well. I will never be able to repay her for everything she has done for me.
Sorry for going on and on haha there is so much more I could say! Most importantly, May is Lyme Disease Awareness Month. Lyme Disease is one of the most underfunded and misunderstood diseases. We disparately need a SAFE vaccine to prevent this awful disease. Wear lime green for Lyme Disease. Thanks for listening sorry if this is kind of a rant
P.S. Be Happy and stay positive!